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Simon Cowell has way too much money

2008-11-06

It's been revealed that Simon Cowell gave ex-girlfriend Terri Seymour a $9.6 million 'goodbye gift' as part of their split. The two had been going out for six years before splitting about six weeks ago. The Scoop reports: Cowell is said to have given Sey...

 

Britney Spears knows she's crazy

2008-11-06

Britney Spears' conversatorship was made permanent recently to absolutely no one's surprise - including Britney. Turns out she knows she's a bowl of nuts and is still having episodes, according to Star: Everyone who knows Brit isn't surprised that this h...

 

Amy Winehouse's Big Day Out!

2008-11-06

Amy Winehouse hasn't been out in public much lately, and last night served as a quiet reminder why her father Mitch presumably locks her in the basement with a box of saltines. Anyway, while her husband Blake was released from jail and immediately carted...

 

Kate Moss' legs: I don't get it

2008-11-06

Kate Moss went shopping in West Hollywood yesterday wearing a ridiculously tiny pair of denim shorts. I can only assume she was trying to be a walking PSA for kids to stay off drugs because there's no logical explanation for why she'd exposed her legs to...

 

Keeley Hazell is no jiggy Heidi Klum - but she'll do

2008-11-06

Apparently, it's Hot Chicks Hawking Video Games Week on The Superficial. Thanks, looming holiday season! Today's hot chick is rising British model Keeley Hazell who, according to Wikipedia, is noted for her large, natural breasts (bra size 32E). See, kid...

 

Britney Spears & Justin Timberlake want to remind you of all that sex they had

2008-11-06

Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake are supposedly performing tonight in Madonna's Sticky & Sweet Tour at Dodger's Stadium, according to Ryan Seacrest (via Us Magazine): They are going to be onstage performing with Madonna, Seacrest said on KIIS-FM host...

 

Wife is Shocked: Charlie Sheen is Still Charlie Sheen

2008-11-06

Former playboy Charlie Sheen seems to be having a hard time being happily married no matter which wife he's currently with. He's in trouble again; this time he's denying he got lap dances from strippers while at the Spearmint Rhino Club in Las Vegas. Acc...

 

Madonna is Still Box Office Poison

2008-11-06

Whoever though Madonna directing a major motion picture was a brilliant idea needs to have their head examined. Oh wait. That would be Madge herself. The Kaballah inspired material girl released her directorial debut film Filth and Wisdom on October 17 bu...

 

Danny Bonaduce To Shell Out $16K Month to Ex-Wife

2008-11-06

Danny Bonaduce has appeared on such TV lite fare as The Smoking Gun: World's Dumbest , Breaking Bonaduce, and I Know My Kid's a Star, plus has a gig as a radio personality. And all that affords him enough money to pay his ex-wife Gretchen $16,000 a month ...

 

Kendra Wilkinson is engaged

2008-11-06

Kendra Wilkinson hasn't even left the Playboy Mansion yet and she's already engaged. Phildadelphia Eagle Hank Baskett proposed to the soon-to-be-former Girl Next Door atop the Space Needle over the weekend. E! News reports: Both fams were present for the...

 

Amy Winehouse's husband released from prison

2008-11-05

Amy Winehouse's husband Blake Fielder-Civil earned an early release from prison today provided he immediately checks into rehab. Blake was serving a 27 month sentence for conspiring to fix a trial involving a bartender he assaulted at a pub. The Sun repo...

 

Paris Hilton voted

2008-11-05

Like every good American should've done yesterday, Paris Hilton went to her county registrar in Norwalk to cast her vote. Although I'm not exactly sure why she's being escorted by security. Is her vote really the vote we as America need to be protecting?...

 

Robert Pattinson is apparently some kind of heartthrob

2008-11-05

Robert Pattinson, star of the chock full o' brooding film Twilight, is your new heartthrob, ladies. Or at least that's what the Tiger Beat on The Geekologie Writer's desk told me. Anyway, I don't really see the appeal of this guy. He looks baked out of h...

 

Kim Kardashian surprisingly confident about squeezing into a voting booth

2008-11-05

Kim Kardashian voted yesterday in Beverly Hills and performed her patriotic duty by combining ample cleavage and democracy. Your country salutes you, Kim! In the meantime, she really let Barack Obama down by not writing Obama '08: The Change We Need! (No...

 

Barack Obama is the President of the United States

2008-11-05

Ladies and Gentleman, Barack H. Obama: The nation's first African-American president! An historic moment that none of us will ever forget. The Superficial will return to its regularly scheduled chicanery tomorrow. But goddamn what a night. EDIT: Just hel...

 

Jennifer Aniston trying to have twins

2008-11-05

Jennifer Aniston is kicking the baby train into full gear and is reportedly trying to increase her chances of having multiples. I understand she wants to be like Angelina Jolie, but why not get some tattoos? Fun thing about them: They're not babies. Star...

 

Katie Holmes under pressure to produce an heir for Tom Cruise

2008-11-05

Okay, sure, America's elected its first black president, but more importantly, when is Katie Holmes going to get off her ass and get pregnant again? And would it kill her to make it a boy? Ok! Magazine reports: In the December issue of Glamour, the star ...

 

Barack Obama Becomes First Black US President

2008-11-05

In an historic moment that none of us will ever forget, Barack Obama won the 2008 election and will become the first black president in US history. He won the national popular vote by a solid margin of six percent and whooped ass on the electoral college....

 

John Edwards in Deep DNA Doo-Doo

2008-11-05

Former Senator John Edwards ('member him? The hair guy?) was THISCLOSE to nabbing the VP slot on the Barack Obama ticket, it was literally his to have and to hold, until his political career imploded over BabyGate in August. Edwards was rumored to have be...

 

Is Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi's Marriage Void?

2008-11-05

So are they married or what? After yesterday's election results, Californians decided to say no to same-sex marriage in their state and voted to make the unions constitutionally illegal. This, after about 16,000 couples got hitched in recent years. So wha...

 

Paris Hilton is a wizard! (Which explains the breasts)

2008-11-04

Paris Hilton set the cutlets to Hello! last night while making an appearance on David Letterman. And, I gotta tell you, I'm starting to love these Paris/Dave interviews. Mostly because he drops a ton of backhanded compliments, and she just giggles like a...

 

Kate Winslet claims this isn't airbrushing at work

2008-11-04

Kate Winslet is featured in the latest issue of Vanity Fair and is reportedly pissed at recent comments claiming her pictorial was airbrushed. Her rep issued the following statement to People: Kate is furious at suggestions that her body has been airbrus...

 

Carrie Underwood bitch-slaps Hollywood

2008-11-04

Country music star Carrie Underwood has no love for celebrities who can't keep their endorsements to themselves, according to TV Guide: There is someone I do support, but I don't support publicly. I lose all respect for celebrities when they back a candi...

 

Vida Guerra in a bikini will distract you while I vote

2008-11-04

Former FHM model Vida Guerra hit the beach yesterday and, yeah, you got me; I'm posting these so I can head off to the voting booth. But don't worry, I'll be back shortly. In the meantime, I expect a deep, intellectual discussion on the aesthetic propert...

 

Heidi Klum sparks religious uproar, confused erections

2008-11-04

Looks like Project Runway can expect a sharp drop among its Hindu viewership. Yahoo! reports: Heidi Klum, who dressed up as Hindu goddess Kali, who symbolizes death and destruction, for her Halloween bash, has left the Hindu community in America fuming....

 

Dudes, Keanu Reeves is Totally Not Guilty

2008-11-04

The soak the rich angle won't work this time - In most excellent news for Keanu Reeves, a jury has totally voted in his favor in his civil trial: He doesn't owe anything to a paparazzo who sued him after he was injured while harrassing Keanu. After delibe...

 

Tila Tequila & Justin Long? Why not?

2008-11-04

Tila Tequila is apparently done with Courtenay Semel because she was spotted making out with Justin Long on Halloween. Okay, now I'm really confused. I thought Tila was bi-sexual not full-on lesbian. Page Six reports: But on Halloween, the Mac Guy hooked...

 

Paris Hilton Pouts: Men are Hungry for My Fame and Fortune

2008-11-04

Paris Hilton was telling everybody who would listen two years ago that she had only been with, like, two guys her entire life. But now the 26-year-old poor lil rich girl is crying real tears to a reporter of the News of the World, saying guys have only wa...

 

It's Finally Here: The Jessica Simpson Sex Tape Rumor

2008-11-04

Jessica Simpson has always held herself up as just a simple girl of high moral value which means that after the spectacle of the Nick Lachey fake marriage, people were wondering when the real Jessica would emerge. Has that time come? According to the Dail...

 

Lindsay Lohan just cost Barack Obama some more votes

2008-11-04

Obviously Lindsay Lohan didn't get the memo from the Obama campaign to Kindly, STFU! because she decided to blog one last time encouraging people to vote. Ha ha, she thinks she has fans. Adorable. From her MySpace page: Sorry i haven't blogged in a minut...

 

Ryan Reynolds runs 26 miles or so

2008-11-03

Ryan Reynolds completed the ING New York City Marathon on Sunday, crossing the finish line in 3 hours and 50 minutes. According to People: Reynolds says in the last leg of the race, he was motivated to keep going by one special spectator. When I saw Mich...

 

Keanu Reeves is 'The One' - who doesn't have to pay shit

2008-11-03

Keanu Reeves won a lawsuit today when a jury of his peers determined he is not liable for the injuries of papparazzo Alison Shiva. Alison claims Keanu struck him with his Porsche in 2007 which damaged his wrist and caused him to lose work. Unfortunately,...

 

Katie Price & Peter Andre pretend they're not getting a divorce

2008-11-03

Katie Jordan Price, who is apparently Paris Hilton's British BFF these days, went out yesterday with her husband Peter Andre. The two are reportedly having marital problems, but you'll have this in a relationship where one party has giant tits while the ...

 

Gisele Bundchen gets naked-like for American Photo's 30th Anniversary

2008-11-03

Gisele Bundchen and her longtime photographer Nino Munoz shot the following set of pics for American Photo's 30th Anniversary Issue. Amidst all the hotness, the final shot is a non-airbrushed pic of Gisele without make-up on which I thought was a little ...

 

Britney Spears is going British again

2008-11-03

Britney Spears is set to promote her new album in two weeks on British television's The X Factor which features American Idol's Simon Cowell. The Daily Mail reports: The star will be singing her new record Womaniser on the show later this month, because ...

 

Joaquin Phoenix's 'retirement' explained: Surprise, it's drugs

2008-11-03

Joaquin Phoenix announced last week he's retiring from acting to pursue a career in music. Sometime between that announcement and Saturday's premiere of Che, where Joaquin arrived with the letters Bye! and Good written on his knuckles (above), the actor ...

 

Miley is Stuck as Hannah For A While Longer

2008-11-03

Even though she outgrew the character a year ago, Miley Cyrus is under contract to ready and willing to continue playing Hannah Montana on the hit Disney show for a bit longer, cuz, like, it's really so much fun. The 15-year-old star gave an interview to...

 

Robert Downey Jr. is a firecrotch

2008-11-03

It's nice to know that some celebrities can still take time out from making millions of dollars and espousing their political beliefs in order to set their genitals ablaze on occasion. Monsters and Critics reports: Robert Downey Jr. set his crotch on fir...

 

Lindsay Lohan's Star Has Fallen. How Badly, You Ask?

2008-11-03

Lindsay Lohan replaced by Denise Richards? Has the Mean Girls star been tarnished so badly that it's come to this?? Apparently, Linds was tapped to host the World Music Awards which will be held next weekend in Monaco, but the organizers thought they nee...

 

Criss Angel's $100 million Vegas show still blows

2008-11-03

After die-hard Criss Angel fans walked out of a special preview of his Cirque Du Soleil show, you figured Mandouche the Magician would've made some changes for this past weekend's grand opening. Nope. The LA Times reports: If Criss Angel were blindfolded...

 

Ice-T & Coco seem like a nice couple

2008-11-02

I pretty much pulled the plug on celebrity Halloween pics yesterday but couldn't resist this set of Ice-T and his wife Coco at Club Plumm Friday night. Mostly because they're recreating the timeless love scene where Black Punisher bangs Slutty Catwoman f...

 

Paris Hilton tired of being used for money, sex

2008-11-02

While in London filming Paris Hilton's British BFF, LongLegs HerpFoot sat down for an interview with News of the World where she discussed her love life, having kids and joining forces with Katie Price: On relationships: Every other guy I've been out wit...

 

John McCain meets Tina Fey's Sarah Palin

2008-11-02

Before we dive into today's posting, did everyone remember to set your clock backs? If you didn't, congratulations, you can smoke/drink/pray to the Baby Jesus your face off for another hour because you're ahead of the game! The Superficial: We're Like a ...

 

Britney Spears unveils her new album cover! (Anyone else just pee a little?)

2008-11-01

Here it is, folks. Britney Spears' album cover for Circus in all its airbrushed/Wait is that Heather Locklear? glory. As if the Internet wasn't a flutter enough, Britney's also released the full track listing - plus bonus song! HOLY SHIT BALLS! I'm pract...

 

Paris Hilton apparently has breasts inside the Matrix

2008-11-01

I know what you're thinking: He said no more Halloween costumes! But I still want to massage his steel abs with my face. It's cool. This is actually Paris Hilton's idea of casual attire while she went shopping last night at Trashy Lingerie in Hollywood. ...

 

Khloe Kardashian as 'Officer Sasquatch' (With guest star Kim Kardashian)

2008-11-01

CROOK: I ain't talkin'. COP #1: Oh, you'll talk. You're going under the lamp with Officer Sasquatch. CROOK: Yeah? He don't sound so tough. COP #1: First off, it's a she, and Officer Sasquatch will rip your arms right off if you don't sing like a canary. ...

 

Criss Angel & Holly Madison thing is really happening

2008-11-01

I pretty much assumed Holly Madison dating Criss Angel was some sort of cruel tabloid joke to make me think there isn't a God. Turns out it wasn't. The two attended the grand opening last night of Criss' Cirque Du Soleil show Believe where the magical do...

 

Carmen Electra, Tila Tequila, Aubrey O'Day & Kirsten Dunst Halloween costumes

2008-11-01

Here's the last round of celebrity Halloween pics before I go insane and start hitting myself in the nuts with a Jack-O-Lantern. Dig in: 1. Carmen Electra as Sexy Theater Candy Girl. I'm diabetic, you heartless bitch! Just kidding. Got any Jujubes? 2. Ti...

 

Kim Kardashian is WONDER WOMAN WITH A CELLULITE PROBLEM

2008-10-31

Kim Kardashian dressed up like Wonder Woman for Halloween and as an avid comic book geek I can't sit idly by without making a few comments: 1. WONDER WOMAN DOESN'T WEAR BLACK PANTYHOSE. Jesus. That's borderline blasphemy! It's pretty sad when Lynda Carte...

 

Kendra Wilkinson is CANDY THE STRIPPER WHO DIDN'T GIVE HER BOYFRIEND HER TIPS? (I have no clue.)

2008-10-31

Okay, last one. (For today.) Here's Kendra Wilkinson at Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon's Halloween party in Manhattan last night. I have no idea what she's supposed to be, but who the hell cares look at that butt. In the meantime, I should probably start f...

 
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