Aubrey O'Day is no idiot. After recently being kicked out of Danity Kane by P. Diddy, she made a beeline for Hugh Hefner while the mediocre fame is still fresh and posed for an upcoming issue of Playboy, according to TMZ: TMZ spies say the Danity Kane ha...

Hey, guys, I'll be taking off the next two days for some R&R, but The Superficial will return to it's regularly scheduled posting on Saturday Nov. 29. For those who haven't noticed: Yes, Virginia, there's posting on the weekends now. Whee! In the meantim...

There's been something missing from Whitney Houston's life since her 2007 divorce from Bobby Brown. Namely, someone who'll cuddle with at night, pack and light her crack pipe, and take a hands-on approach to curing her constipation. But those dark, lonel...

Beyonce performed on The Today Show this morning, and I don't know sign language, but I'm pretty sure I can decipher the message being delivered here: Kim Kardashian, it's on. My ghetto booty vs. your buttpad. Downtown LA. November 29. 6-8 PM. (On accoun...

Are you surprised that Brooke Burke and partner Derek Hough won the seventh season of 'Dancing With the Stars' last night? Brooke and Derek sure were: Unbelievable! they gushed in unison. The actress and former 'Rock Star' host showed she had the skills ...

Fa la la la! Ann I'll Say My Own Mother is a Queer Terrorist to Sell Books Coulter's jaw is reportedly wired shut after she broke it it in an undisclosed incident, according to Page Six. Wow. Can you folks excuse me? I suddenly feel the need to laugh hys...

Fame whores Spencer Pratt and the chick that Lauren Conrad doesn't like, Heidi Montag, have eloped. 'The Hills' couple, whose every move is planned and scripted in their reality life, got hitched in an ultra private wedding ceremony held on November 20. R...

A topless Dita Von Teese appears in the December issue of Playboy Germany and, sonofabitch, that's it. I'm moving to Germany. I thought this country was kickass, but when we can't even get Dita Von Teese to pose in our Playboy for the holidays, it's time...

Kabbalah School dropout Alex Rodriguez is planning to spend Thanksgiving with Madonna instead of his kids, who will be spending it with their mom and A-Rod's estranged wife who left him because of his affair with the older Vadge. Access Hollywood is repor...

Jamie Spears has apparently had enough of Britney's yapping and dished out The Muzzle this afternoon while plowing through a crowd at LAX. Am I the only one who stood up and clapped? Anyone? BRITNEY: But, dad, if I say there's a bomb in my hat they'll mo...

With the kind of tolerance that Amy Winehouse has built up over the years, you'd think she'd be able to inject nuclear waste directly into her eyeballs and at worst come down with a case of the giggles. But no, it seems that prescription drugs are her Ac...

With Thanksgiving in a few days, one can't help but focus on the things that really matter in life. Like gathering a volatile collection of relatives under the same roof and watching the crazy explode like an overcooked burrito in the microwave. People r...

Remember when I said Britney Spears should never leave the house without being airbrushed? I forgot one important fact: You can't airbrush trailer park. Seriously, did Britney shoot this Rolling Stone cover herself? Here's mah belly, y'all! It'll sell th...

Pete Wentz called into Ryan Seacrest this morning to talk about what it was like seeing the birth of little doomed-for-life Bronx Mowgli. Us Magazine reports: Right before she went into labor, I was like, 'Oh my God, I think I'm having a heart attack!' N...

What you're looking at is security tape footage of Lindsay Lohan at a Washington D.C. club where Samantha Ronson recently DJ'ed. Highlights include: Recovering alcoholic Lindsay pouring herself vodka and Red Bulls; some lesbian making out - or heterosexu...

Usually, after leaving your wife in a highly-publicized divorce, it's important to let your kids know you still love them. Especially around the holidays. Or you can go the A-Rod route and totally bail on them to eat turkey with your Cryptkeeper mistress...

Paris Hilton isn't taking her split with Benji Madden late last week sitting down. In fact, she celebrated the break-up by prancing around dressed as some kind of slutty meter maid for the opening of the Pussycat Dolls Lounge at the Viper Room in L.A. on...

Hugh Jackman is People's Sexiest Man Alive this year, and two-time winner George Clooney ain't too happy about it. You see, nobody cock-blocks The Clooney's lonely housewife buffet. NOBODY!: George Clooney rang me at two in the morning, Jackman told PEOP...

Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt reportedly eloped in Cabo San Lucas on Thursday November 20. The two exchanged vows, and Spencer, keeping true to his deep spiritual connection with Heidi, bartered his with Perez Hilton for some free publicity: Heidi, from...

Winning two American Music Awards for Best Pop/Rock Female Artist and Best Soul/R&B Female Artist: Boring. Bringing back the Evil Shredder look: Priceless. EDIT: Bumped up Rihanna for pretty obvious reasons. (Read: Heidi & Spencer posts make you want to...

Saturday night, fashion designer Christian Audigier threw his daughter Crystal Rock a 16th birthday party in Hollywood that made every single episode of My Super Sweet 16 look like it was filmed at goddamn Chuck E. Cheese. Take a look at what he sprung f...

Great news, folks. Ever wanted to rent Miley Cyrus for your office Christmas party but thought she'd be too classy to show up? Well, Feliz Navidad, motherfuckers! Dreams do come true. The Houston Chronicle reports: Tweendom's reigning queen is the star p...

As evidenced by her upcoming documentary, Britney Spears isn't digging the insanely miraculous job her father Jamie has done of getting her shit in order. Sure, maybe her career's back on track and she can see her kids, but he won't let her see Adnan. Yu...

Pulling a page directly out of Oprah's book then Xeroxing it, Madonna wants to build a girls school in Malawi, Africa. She recently announced her intentions on the website of her non-profit organization Raising Malawi. FOX News reports: Of course, Oprah'...

The vampire-loves-mortal high school girl flick 'Twilight' and beautiful dude Robert Pattinson, but mostly beautiful dude Robert Pattinson, were the reason tens of thousands of tween and teen girls spent the past three days screaming at the theater big sc...

Chris Brown was the big winner at the American Music Awards last night, but unlike Kanye West, he was surprised and humbled by the honor. I don't know what to say. I would have given it to Coldplay, said Brown, 19, who was also named Artist of the year, m...

Travis Barker spoke out last night about the lawsuit he filed against the owners and makers of the Learjet that he barely escaped from when it crashed in September. E! News reports: I wouldn't have been in the state I was in if I wasn't in the crash, sai...

Amy Winehouse, presumably in exchange for a wheelbarrow full of crack, has revealed to News of the World that her marriage to Blake-Fielder Civil is over. He's leaving her for German model Sophie Schandorff which is a significant improvement on his part....

Megan Fox recently attended the GQ Men of the Year Awards where she drank herself stupid and revealed she has a disturbing thing for High School Musical's Zac Efron, according to Page Six: The stunning Fox drank enough to confess to a Page Six operative ...

Kim Kardashian and Robert Shapiro debuted their online shoe service Shoe Dazzle at the Rohn Padmore Red Carpet Suite this weekend. Because nothing sells women's footwear like the guy who helped O.J. beat a murder rap. I'm guessing after every 10th purcha...

Poor Sarah Ball over at Newsweek got stuck with the assignment to call Jean-Claude Van Damme and discuss his latest movie J.C.V.D. I say poor because what Sarah's editors neglected to tell her is the man's flipping Froot Loops and has a penchant for horr...

Middle-aged? Recently dumped by your respectable-looking musician boyfriend/husband? Don't worry. David Spade's gonna make everything alright. OK! Magazine reports: The Desperate Housewives star was celebrating her 45th birthday at new L.A. hot spot Luau...

When Old Lady McGrossBoobs isn't pretending to be Paris Hilton, she spends her free time trying to sue Hulk Hogan into paying for shit. She currently rakes in $40 grand a month in spousal support, but how can she send her boytoy Charley to sea school on ...

Jessica Simpson took time off from eating bread crumbs down by the lake to let the world know how adorable her new nephew Bronx Mowgli Wentz is. According to People: Bronx is beyond precious. I'm over the moon with joy, the singer said Friday. Life is a ...

Travis Barker is filing a negligence lawsuit against the owners and makers of the Learjet that left four people dead and the former Blink 182 drummer, along with DJ AM, severely burnt. According to recordings released by the Federal Aviation Administrati...

Paris Hilton called into Ryan Seacrest's radio show this morning to set the record straight on her relationship with Benji Madden. Supposedly, the two are just talking a break, and Paris hinted they could get back together, according to E! News: He is an...

What does it say about me as a person that, if Katie Price was selling cyanide capsules, I'd probably buy an entire case and pop them like candy? Besides that I'm awesome and people are genuinely surprised to learn I don't drive a battleship to work. Ph...

There's no real reason I'm posting these, I'm just fond of photos of Victoria Beckham. Boy, that's some natural looking cleavage isn't it? I'm pretty sure her plastic surgeon just cut an orange in half and super glued them in there. Photos: Pacific Coas...

John Mayer was reportedly introduced to Jennifer Aniston's father 75-year-old actor John Aniston Wednesday night. The couple dined with Jen's dad and his wife Sherry Rooney at the Beverly Hills Hotel where the Minstrel of Douche apparently impressed Mr. ...

Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz are parents! The eyeliner sharing couple welcomed a baby boy who arrived yesterday, November 20, weighing in at 7 lbs., 11 oz., and was 20 1/2 inches long. Welcome to the world, precious little guy. Wait until you find out yo...

Wanna know Samantha Ronson's secret to keeping Lindsay Lohan a lesbian? Punching. Lots and lots of punching. Sam reportedly let the fists fly early yesterday morning at a London nightclub when she saw Lindsay dancing with her ex Calum Best, according to ...

Ashlee Simpson-Wentz gave birth to a baby boy last night and simultaneously won the You've Got to Be Shitting Me Award for the most ridiculous baby name. People reports: Bronx Mowgli Wentz weighed 7 lbs., 11 oz., and was 20 1/2 inches long. Ashlee, Pete ...

You know what's always a good thing to do before punching celebrities in a charity boxing match? Check with your parole officer. A crucial step Michael Lohan seems to have skipped, according to TMZ: Lindsay's dad got the hook for that charity boxing matc...

Fresh off his breakup with Paris Hilton, Benji Madden went out in Hollywood as a single man last night, and if I were him, I'd be grinning like I got doused in the face with Smylex gas. But probably even more so considering he just escaped the vaginal eq...

Paris Hilton and Benji Madden officially threw in the towel yesterday, according to her rep. While Paris was recently spotted with her ex Stavros Niarchos over the weekend, friends say that had nothing to do with the breakup. Which I entirely believe bas...

Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart, stars of the movie Twilight, stopped by The Today Show this morning where they took questions from a maniacal gaggle of teenage girls. You could tell in the video (after the jump) Robert Pattinson was definitely broa...

Man, British people are smart. The folks over at BBC News made a startling discovery over the weekend: Karolina Kurkova doesn't have a belly button. Wait. Women have belly buttons? When did that happen?: Its absence was noticed this week when the 24-year...

Paris Hilton and her true love, Good Charlotte's Benji Madden, have split up after nine long months of dating. Not that Paris seems all that upset - she's already been photographed partying with her ex beau shipping heir Stavros Niarchos over the weekend....

Guy Ritchie just poured tea, biscuits and poor dental hygiene all over Madonna's claims that he's a gold-digger. The British director has refused to accept a penny of her money in their divorce settlement with his only concern being the living arrangemen...

Pregnant actress Jennifer Garner has made public the sad fact that she has been the target of a crazed stalker since 2002. The fan, who's name is Steven Burky, has become so obsessed with the former Alias star that Jennifer has gone to court to get the cu...