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That DUI Really Scared Amanda Bynes Straight

2012-04-13

Straight up onto the curb! (I’ll go kill myself.) Barely even a week ago, Amanda Bynes was arrested for DUI. And while most normal people follow that up by lying low and reexamining their lives, Amanda Bynes got right back on the horse like a tro...

 

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt ARE Officially Engaged!

2012-04-13

Hollywood couple Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have recently confirmed they'll be soon walking down the aisle!...

 

Rachel Bilson Wore A Bikini And Other News

2012-04-13

Posted by Photo Boy - Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie might tag-team Fassbender in a movie that I will in no way be arrested for publicly masturbating to. - Yoga Pants: I don’t know what they made of... - The best way to experience Scarlett Johansso...

 

It's Hayden Panettiere In a Bikini

2012-04-12

Hey! Why don’t you stick to your own kind, Hayden Panettiere? (Alright, Peter Dinklage, she’s practically putty in your hands. Now what I’m going need you to do is put on this Robin costume and ride in this sidecar attached to a motor...

 

Alexander Skarsgard & Thor Just Plundered A Hole In The Sex-Time Continuum

2012-04-12

Fun fact: Alexander Skarsgard was one of the top rumored contenders for the role of Thor which thankfully didn’t happen because Chris Hemsworth taught us that Thor is best played by someone with a stocky Viking-esque build as opposed to a tall, l...

 

Axl Rose Turns Down Induction Into Hall of Fame, Still Really Hates Original Guns N' Roses

2012-04-12

I was going to start this post with some sort of clever quip about how getting laid immediately fills a man with a certain bravado that 100% of the time leads to him making horrible fucking decisions. But then I remembered Axl Rose has been crazy for a...

 

The Crap We Missed – Thursday 4.12.12

2012-04-12

Welcome to The Crap We Missed where it’s become clear, and I say this as a huge fan, that John Malkovich shouldn’t be allowed to dress himself anymore. I mean, christ, Harry Dean Stanton is more put together and he’s been dead for 20 ...

 

Rihanna Wants Us to Respect Her Privacy, So Here She is Naked Under a Trenchcoat in Public

2012-04-12

Posted by Photo Boy A few weeks ago Rihanna put a reporter on blast (I’m honestly not even sure of what that means.) for asking about rumors that she’s been reminding Ashton Kutcher of the joys of a less-than-half-a-century old vagina. Well...

 

Stephanie Pratt Is Still A Person That's Alive Wearing Bikinis And Other News

2012-04-12

Posted by Photo Boy - Zac Efron will bang you if you go see The Lucky One is how you’re supposed to interpret this. - Hot Redheads = A Bullseye in Darts? (No idea, but titties!) - Anderson Cooper giggles like a little girl again at something only...

 

Courtney Love: 'Dave Grohl Banged Frances Bean Because He's Sexually Obsessed With Kurt Cobain'

2012-04-12

If Courtney Love hasn’t fully alienated herself from her daughter Frances Bean, this should probably do it. In a new Twitter rant, screencapped by Gawker and well worth a click, Courtney blatantly accuses Dave Grohl of not only trying to bang Fra...

 

Mel Gibson Wants To Kill Oksana Grigorieva During Anal Sex. Haha! Old People.

2012-04-12

“Blow me before the Jacuzzi. Blow me before the Jacuzzi. Blow me before the Jacuzzi. Blow ME before the Jacuzzi. Blow me before the Jacuzzi. Blow me before the JACUZZI. Blow me before the Jacuzzi. BLOW me before the Jacuzzi. Blow me before the Ja...

 

Mark Ruffalo Jealous on Avengers Co-Stars

2012-04-12

The Avengers star Mark Ruffalo has recently declared he felt a little jealous on his co-stars because he didn't have a costume of his own!...

 

Britney Spears Is Getting $15 Million To Be An 'X-Factor' Judge. Britney Spears.

2012-04-12

“But daddy, those furnch fries were down there for me.” Britney Spears can’t even get married without her husband being named her co-conservator because according to the state of California, she technically shouldn’t even brush ...

 

Jennifer Love Hewitt Moved On To Maksim Chmerkovskiy Already

2012-04-11

“Why hello there. Are you here to select a ring? No, just mow the yard? Oh, Jorge, you know I’m going to ask each morn- wait, don’t quit! Your family’s still in Mexico!” Sensing that Operation: Chain Adam Levine To The Wat...

 

Alicia Silverstone Is 'Very Glad' She Pukes Into Her Kid's Mouth To Feed Him

2012-04-11

After voluntarily informing the entire Internet she pre-chews her son’s food then Frenches it into his 11-month-old mouth, Alicia Silverstone now wants everyone to know she’s “very glad” she’s accomplished such an incredib...

 

The Crap We Missed – Wednesday 4.11.12

2012-04-11

Welcome to Wednesday’s The Crap We Missed where Michael Bay gets ready to bang his car until it begs him to stop in sassy jive talk, Michael Fassbender pitches himself for the lead in Gladiator 2, “No, what I’m telling you is that it ...

 

Kim Kardashian is Kanye's 'Beyonce'

2012-04-11

So welcome to the exact moment Jay-Z shoots Kanye West in the goddamn face though it might not be a bad idea if we all think happy thoughts while clapping our hands: Carrying Peter Dinklage in a baby Bjorn! Via Us Weekly: A pal tells the new Us Weekly,...

 

We Get It, Lana Del Rey. You're Banging Axl Rose.

2012-04-11

Lana Del Rey has already banged Marilyn Manson, so it really shouldn’t be a surprise that she’s moved on to Axl Rose which she made even more evident by wearing a Guns ‘N Roses T-shirt in London last night after the two were spotted t...

 

You're Supposed To Believe Joe Jonas Has Sex With This And Other News

2012-04-11

- Cue Jessica Simpson suddenly giving birth in 3.. 2.. - Hello, large-breasted Asian in a bikini holding drinks… - Leonardo DiCaprio has no problem banging Adam Levine‘s table scraps. - Supermodels Without Makeup - Snoop Dogg's Rolling Word...

 

Jennifer Lawrence Has a Look-Alike Doll

2012-04-11

According to the latest reports, Jennifer Lawrence was added to the list of celebrities that have a doll dedicated to them....

 

Miley Cyrus Can't Take Her Dang Ol' Side-Titty To The Dang Ol' Store Without Them Dang Ol' Cameras Goin' Click Click Click Click

2012-04-11

On Monday we got to see Miley Cyrus riding a bike in a short dress without underwear on after complaining earlier that the “douchebag paparazzi” can’t seem to leave her alone. So naturally here she is yesterday where, again, the papar...

 

A Justin Bieber 'Impersonator' Was Molesting Kids, You Say?

2012-04-10

“Here, kiddy, kiddy, kiddies. Come get the pup- Dammit, Selena. I told you to wait in the truck.” In the hustle and bustle of the holiday season, somehow news that a Justin Bieber “impersonator” was arrested in Canada for child ...

 

This Is The Last Time You'll See Jessica Simpson Looking 'Fat,' According To Jessica Simpson

2012-04-10

Last month, we saw a pregnant Jessica Simpson posing nude for the April issue of Elle which apparently hit newsstands because here she is pimping the issue on Twitter while making the most ridiculous statement she’ll ever make in her life. And, yes...

 

The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 4.10.12

2012-04-10

No, no, NOOOOO. Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed featuring Shannen Doherty because time is a motherfucker, but not nearly as big of one as God is considering he had Christie Brinkley‘s DNA to work with and he made Alexa Ray Joel inst...

 

Jennifer Love Hewitt's Imagination Already Skipped To The Part Where Adam Levine Rejects Her

2012-04-10

Last week, Jennifer Love Hewitt informed the entire studio audience of The Ellen DeGeneres Show that she’s working on an elaborate system of traps to ensnare Adam Levine because she’s lonely and it’s sometimes nice to talk to people s...

 

Aww, Who's The Prettiest Girl In The Whole Art Museum?

2012-04-10

It’s you, Bam Margera. It’s you. Photos: Splash News, WENNRead More ... ...

 

'Teen Mom' Leah Got Married Again

2012-04-10

Posted by Photo Boy At just 19 years of age, the sound-decision-making machine known as Leah Messer has once again tied the knot. Only this time it won’t end in six months like her last marriage did because banged another dude days before the wed...

 

Amanda Bynes' Dad Says She Doesn't Drink, Here's Video Of Her Drinking

2012-04-10

For those of you who don’t know because I didn’t post about it therefore raising the question if it ever really happened at all, Amanda Bynes was arrested for DUI Friday morning after she plowed into the back of a cop car. So if you ever fi...

 

Hilary Duff's Child Will Not Go Hungry And Other News

2012-04-10

- So here’s James Franco doing Selena Gomez. - If You Like Tattoos (and women) Get In Here - I, too, wonder how Tom Cruise is so good at never being photographed unless he wants to be and then I remember it’s possible for one man to have se...

 

Anne Hathaway Had Hair Hacked Off for Movie Role

2012-04-10

When it's about a movie role, an actress can do so much! Hollywood beauty Anne Hathaway – who is well known for her luscious locks – agreed to have her hair hacked off for her new movie role....

 

Hey, Mark Wahlberg's Kids

2012-04-09

Say hi to your mother for me. Photos: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash NewsRead More ... ...

 

Kanye's On The New Season Of 'Keeping Up With The Kardashians.' And There It Is.

2012-04-09

“Our deal was you stab my mother in the heart with a stake, and I have sex with you in front of Matt Lauer. Now are you going to hold up your end of the bargain or not?” “Damn, chill, woman. I’ll handle it. Now quit talkin’...

 

The Crap We Missed – Monday 4.9.12

2012-04-09

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed starring Adam Brody as the Fonz in the gay porn version of Happy Days, Steven Tyler as himself in the gay porn version of Aerosmith, and Milo Ventimiglia in the gay porn version of motorcycle ownership. Oh C...

 

Britney Spears' Fiance Is Now Her Conservator Because That's Not At All Messed Up

2012-04-09

“I SEWED IT ALL BY MAHSELF!” Back in January, Britney Spears‘s dad was rumored to be ending her conservatorship as a wedding gift which seemed like the best possible way to make this whole situation not look like he literally sold her...

 

Zac Efron Should Probably Learn How Glass Works

2012-04-09

“Dude, I’m telling you, they put me in the same room Paris Hilton stays in after I specifically asked them not to. How do I know? *looks down pants* Call it a hunch. Now you’re my agent, fix this. In the meantime, I’ll be errati...

 

Lindsay Lohan Selling Her Clothes for Money

2012-04-09

According to report, troubled actress Lindsay Lohan is desperate to make some money because she is buried in debts....

 

Miley Cyrus Ridin' That Dang Ol' Bike Ain't Havin' No Cammermans Peepin' Up Her Squirrel Biskit

2012-04-09

“Seriously? The one day I forget to shave it into a mullet? I’m so grounded.” Here’s Miley Cyrus riding a bicycle in a short black dress without any underwear on on over the weekend which is amazing for someone who just a day ea...

 

Well, Good Morning, Brooklyn Decker in a Bikini, and Other News

2012-04-09

- And good morning to you, too, pair of breasts wearing bunny ears. - Thomas Kinkade is pissing on things in Heaven now. - So apparently the pitch for Jennifer Love Hewitt‘s new show was, “And then she jerks everybody off.” - Justin B...

 

Lamar Odom Just Quit The Dallas Mavericks

2012-04-09

Back in December, Lamar Odom was unceremoniously traded to the Dallas Mavericks by the Lakers and somehow talked Khloe Kardashian into moving with him despite her family’s track record of never leaving LA because it’s rich in whore-ranium. ...

 

The Most Important People on The Internet: Volume 2.15

2012-04-06

Welcome to this week’s installment of The Most Important People on The Internet, coming at you a day early thanks to the holiday weekend. On that note, I’d like to offer my sincere apologies to Easter. Not so much, or even at all, for all t...

 

Ben Stiller's Kids Make Him Laugh

2012-04-06

Hollywood actor Ben Stiller has revealed he has crazy, funny kids!...

 

The Crap We Missed – Thursday 4.5.12

2012-04-05

Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed which will be our last one for the week so we can hide pastel eggs to celebrate some ghost that keeps haunting people until the free market is deregulated and sluts stop fucking for the slut-thrill of it, ...

 

Emma Stone and Andrew Garfield Living Together

2012-04-05

According to the latest reports, Hollywood stars Emma Stone, 23, and Andrew Garfield, 28, are taking their relationship to the next level as they move in together!...

 

Here's Tim Tebow Getting A Mani/Pedi

2012-04-05

Above is former Broncos quarterback Tim Tebow getting a mani/pedi in West Hollywood on Tuesday. Below are three beautiful women he chose not to have sex with. I’m sure it’s just a coincidence. Photo: Courtesy of TMZ.comRead More ... ...

 

Kim Kardashian Was Cheating On Kris Humphries With Kanye West The Whole Time

2012-04-05

Ever since Kim Kardashian announced their divorce, Kris Humphries has been in a long heated legal battle to have their settlement aired in open court so he can expose the entire marriage as a premeditated fraud by subpoenaing her texts, emails and real...

 

Jennifer Love Hewitt Thinks She Can Bang Adam Levine Now

2012-04-05

Adam Levine has spent the better part of a year alternating between banging super-thin model Anne V and complaining about Christina Aguilera’s weight ruining The Voice, so right off the bat, you can tell he’d be completely open to having se...

 

Good Morning, Jessica Alba Wearing Yoga Pants, And Other News

2012-04-05

- Kristen Wiig, Andy Samberg and Jason Sudeikis are done with SNL after this season. - A Real-Life Barbie Doll Who Wants Your Attention - Arnold Schwarzenegger describing how a Twins sequel with Eddie Murphy as their triplet explains why woman have no ...

 

BREAKING: Scarlett Johansson's Breasts Jiggle In 'The Avengers'

2012-04-04

If you’re like me, you’ve spent countless hours wondering how Scarlett Johansson landed the role of Black Widow and also why there’s a layer of dust on your penis. Except if you haven’t seen the clip above from The Avengers that...

 

Lara Flynn Boyle's Hogging All The Sexy

2012-04-04

For those of you who don’t remember Lara Flynn Boyle, she was some sort of walking, anorexic, stick-like punchline from the early aughts that I think was in Men in Black 2 and The Practice but definitely know was Wayne’s psycho ex-girlfrien...

 

Andrew Garfield Is Completely Naked Under His 'Spider-Man' Costume

2012-04-04

“By the way, I’m naked under here.” “Wait, what-” “Go, go, Spidey-groin!” Sorry to inundate you with two posts about Marvel movies today, but it’s Zombie Jesus Week so zombie suck it up. In a new intervie...

 
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